Social Anxiety

My hair is all dry and frizzy and looks like crapola. Anyone know of a good product that will help with that?

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There’s an itchy tag on my shirt that’s driving me crazy.

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The past week was way funky. My ex had the kids, I didn’t get to see them. I was trying to be positive about it at first and tell myself it’s only a week, not like it’s a month or a year. And as a bonus I’d get to spend the whole week with my honey and all that mushy crap which of course doesn’t work out like you want it to. He was busying working on the site and stuff and when he’s doing that he’s totally unaware of everything else. Basically it was a long crappy week and I can’t wait till tomorrow night when I have my kids again and they’re screaming and yelling and driving me nuts

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My ex is taking the kids to see MY mom in Kentucky. Why would he do that? He wasn’t close to my mom, he only talked to her when we went down there to visit which was only a couple times. I think he’s up to something. The man doesn’t do anything unless it benifits him in some way.   

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I am so frikin sick of cleaning up after everyone, the kids and the boyfriend. They’re a bunch of dang slobs. How many glasses do you have to dirty in one day? All of them of course. And you have to leave your dirty dishes in the livingroom, never help by taking them to the kitchen. Leave your crap all over the house. Leave your chips on the table. No one seems to frikin care if the place looks like crap except me. If there’s more than 4 dirty glasses sitting around in the morning when I get up I’m kicking the big one out. He can go live by his own damn self. Is it that hard to pick up your mess or put stuff away? I think not.

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It’s been a busy week. Monday I painted my livingroom a beautiful lavendar color, it looks great with my green curtains and couch. Tuesday we all went to the zoo. I think the kids and Brian enjoyed that. We got to hear the lion roar while we were there. It was awesome  Wednesday we went to Indiana Beach which is an amusement park. That was a lot of fun. It was humid, but not too hot. The kids had a good time, well so did I, except the rickety roller coasters gave me a headache. We were planning on going to the beach tomorrow, but it’s not supposed to be too nice so I think we’ll skip it, stay home and watch a movie

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Went to the store this morning and got some corn on the cob. Came home and shucked it and got it cooked, made some sloppy joe to go with it and as I was sitting there eating it it brought back all these memories of when I was a kid. I had an uncle who was a farmer. Acutally, my great uncle Donald. He passed away at the end of last year, cancer. He’d been fighting it for awhile and it finally took him. He was my grandma’s brother, their father had owned the farm, when he passed away it went to my grandma’s brother. When my uncle passed away it went to his son, Doug. And now it’s Doug and his son running it.  It’s a nice family thing going on there. My uncle mainly grew field corn, I think he sold most of, maybe kept some for his cows when he had them, I’m not sure. but he always grew a patch of sweet corn too. Every summer when the corn was ready he’d go out and pick it and then me, my grandma, her kids, my cousin’s, we’d all go over there and spend the entire morning shucking corn. Everyone got a lawn chair and we’d sit in a big circle shucking the corn. Even my great grandma shucked it, I also remember way back when my mom was there too. Everyone pitched in to work on the corn. There was a huge cast iron pot, like you’d see a witch brewing something in. The guys would light a big fire out side and put the pot over it, fill it with water and cook the corn in it. After the corn was cooked, they’d put it in to cold water, then they’d bring it over to the lady’s who had these corn cutters that cut the corn off the cob. Once the corn was off the cob it was my job to put in plastic boxes which it’d be stored in in the freezer. That was the best corn I’ve ever had, canned corn is really crap compared to that fresh cut corn. I’ve never found anything that even comes close to being as good as that was. My dad refuses to even eat corn anymore because it’s not as good as Uncle Donald’s was, lol. For lunch on that corn shucking day we’d usually have sloppy joe and corn on the cob! I don’t recall ever having a sloppy joe, I’d fill up on corn.

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I had been working every Tuesday and Thursday since February. My kids were at a babysitter’s while I was at work. They started to complain about going over there, saying they were bored and she didn’t feed them enough. They asked if they could stay home with my boyfriend (Brian) while I went to work. Now this was something they had mentioned to their father before and he said no, he didn’t want them to be left here with Brian. At first I was like fine, you have to go to the babysitter, that’s what you’re dad wants. But then I decided that it wasn’t going to hurt to give it a shot and let Brian watch them. They were fine with him, they were happy to be at home, he made sure they got breakfast and lunch and they weren’t out running around willy nilly. It was fine with me too, except that the house would be a mess when I got home from work. The final straw with that was one day I came home and a whole pitcher of tea had leaked out in the fridge. It was in one of those glass pitches that has the spout on it, $5 at Meijer and the frickin spout leaked. So there was a whole pitcher of tea all over the fridge. The kids had told Brian it was leaking. He did nothing. He left it there for me to clean up when I got home. That was it with him watching them, I started taking them back to the babysitter. All the while that Brian was watching them my ex was giving me a hard time about it. He did not want them staying here with Brian at all. He started calling me every night asking weird questions and then telling me that he was recording the phone calls. After about a week of his harassing phone calls, he rang one night at 8, I had Brian answer the phone and tell him I didn’t want to talk to him. He then called back twice, we didn’t answer. About 30 minutes later a cop showed up at my door. My ex called the cops and told them that he thought the kids were in danger. The cop talked to me for a minute then the kids, then to me about the ex, he kind of rolled his eyes and seemed perturbed that he got sent out on a call like this. A bull crap call. It wasn’t long after the visit from the cop that I got served with papers saying that my ex was suing for sole custody of the kids, and there was a court date for the next week. I went and saw my lawyer that had done my divorce. She sucked, but I was desperate and needed to know what I should do. She said she’d request a new judge which would cancel the court date for next week. So I said ok. Maybe a week after that I got a call from my lawyer, she asked me if I owned a gun. Yes, I do. She said that was my ex’s concern, was that I had a gun in the house and that I should get rid of it. I yelled at her on the phone. It’s my right to have a gun, blah blah blah. She said get rid of it. I said whatever and hung up. I haven’t talked to her since then. I have no idea if she told my ex’s lawyer that I was going to get rid of it or not. I have no idea if we’re still going to be going to court or not. Tuesday night of this week 3 men from the ATF, yes, alcohol tobacco firearms, showed up at my house. They said that someone had reported to the FBI that I had a firearm in the house and that there was a felon living here. The felon being Brian. I said no, you have the wrong guy, it’s not him. Poor Brian had to go out and talk to them, give him his license and SSN. They checked him out and come back saying it’s not him, he’s clear. Well duh he’s clear. So who would report something like that to the FBI? No doubt it was my ex, trying to get us in trouble. I try not to say a whole lot of bad things about the man, as he is the father of 2 of my kids, and there’s 3 sides to every story. His, Her’s, and what really happened, so this is just my take on things. I think that something is really wrong with him. He pays me child support every Friday, he writes me a check and I give him a receipt. I’ve never given him any kind of hassle about writing a receipt, never even given him a reason to think that I wouldn’t give him a receipt. He sees me walk in the house with the receipt book in my hand.  So Friday I went in to get my check. I asked him if he had it written yet and he asked if I had a receipt. The receipt book was in my hand. I said, I’m going to write one, is the check ready?  he then asks again if I’m going to give him a receipt. Yes, I always do. He then walks over to the table and picks up the phone book which he had the check hiding under. He hid the check and had to make sure I was going to write a receipt. I don’t understand what is up with that or why he thinks I wouldn’t give him a receipt.

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My wonderful boyfriend makes me a turkey sandwich and gives me almost a pound of turkey on the sandwich and a bag of chips on my plate. I took off most of the meat and gave him the chips, then I look at him and go I can’t eat all this. He say You need to catch up with me! (weight wise) I said no way, don’t you like your women skinny? And he says “No, I like them fat like you.” He’s a funny s.o.b

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My 15 year old daughter says,”Mom, you’re really pretty for someone who’s 31.”

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